The Big Panty Woman and the Barefoot Man

I was sent this poem today by Ian Kent, the Treasurer of the Surrey Business Club following our meeting last night at Waterstone’s in Guildford, where I was presenting on how to publish a book to promote your business.

Ian was insisting he couldn’t write, I think like me you’ll disagree. What he sent me made me smile and realise that Chartered Accountants are people too !

I hope it will bring some sunshine to your day too – thanks so much for sharing Ian

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For you, Calypso rhythm I hope it won’t offend,

An air of buxom woman with a big rear end,

And the prospect of paradise where size reigns supreme,

On a diet of excesses, peaches and cream,

Something to hold onto, something to caress,

Oh, Big Panty Woman! Ample Goddess!


But has the man lost his marbles with his socks and shoes?

Does he not know what he’s missing? Oh, if only he could choose,

A woman of perfect proportion is the answer to his dreams,

Beauty, style and elegance is what he’s missed it seems,

Barefoot man with all your sass why do you act supreme,

But then of course what can we expect you haven’t met Claudine

© Ian J Kent 18/12/98


(Thoughts on hearing BIG PANTY WOMAN by THE BAREFOOT MAN, a recording made popular by Sarah Kennedy on BBC Radio 2)